Your 3-year-old now
She's 3, but still having tantrums. Although she's older, when she's upset she's every bit as emotionally primitive as she was as a toddler. (And, brace yourself — it's not unusual for occasional tantrums to pop up through the fours and beyond.) When your child is in full-meltdown mode, don't try to reason with her, no matter how advanced her language skills are. Stay calm, even detached. Raised voices and anger only escalate the situation. If you can, ignore her. If you're in public, try to remove her to your car or some other more private, less overwhelming place.
In one important way, handling a tantrum with a 3-year-old is different: Giving in is especially risky at this age because it sets a dangerous precedent — your child is able to remember that pitching a fit can work. For instance, she screams because she doesn't want to pick up her toys so you let it slide, or she flails when she can't have candy in the checkout aisle, so you give in "just this once" to hush her up. If you cave, you teach her that screaming works and that all limits are flexible — probably not the kind of discipline messages you're aiming for.
A great prevention technique: Reward your child when you see her handling frustration or disappointment in a mature way. "Wow, I like how you didn't fuss one bit when I asked you to help pick up the toys on the floor before going outside."
Your life now
Make reading interactive and your child will get even more out of the experience (and you'll ward off the boredom of reading the same story 900 times). Ask questions about the pictures to reinforce numbers, colors, and other skills: "Can you count the monkeys? ... What does a puppy say? ... Where's the red house?" Let your preschooler predict what will happen on the next page. Insert her name in place of the main character's.
source www.parentcenter.babycenter.com
Showing posts with label timeline. Show all posts
Showing posts with label timeline. Show all posts
21.7.08
3-year-old timeline: Name Writing
Your 3-year-old now
It's exciting when your child's scribbles begin to look more like real letters. Some threes even start writing their name, or a few letters of it. But writing is one of those developmental milestones that varies greatly from child to child. Don't stress out if your child isn't even interested in writing.
A lot depends on fine motor development. Your child may have a clear dominant hand by now (or it may not be clear for another year or so). But it's still hard to control a pencil to make letters with diagonal lines (M, N, K). Other letters may not look quite right either. The lines might not connect at the right place, or letters like E may have too many horizontal lines. What kids should be able to do at this age is copy a circle and make an "x."
Regardless of where your child is on the spectrum, encourage his writing by keeping paper, fat pencils, fat crayons, and chalk within easy reach. Another way to pique interest: Pour sand, salt, or sugar onto a tray and show him how to trace letters with a finger.
Your life now
Some clever bedtime resisters prolong the routine by asking you to kiss not only them, but an ever-increasing cast of stuffed animals. If your child tries luring you into a 20-minute kissing party, put your foot down. What seems fun at first will get tiresome fast. Say, "You have too many animals for me to kiss. Let's pick three, and then I'll blow a big kiss to all the rest when I walk out the door."
Source http://www.parentcenter.babycenter.com/
It's exciting when your child's scribbles begin to look more like real letters. Some threes even start writing their name, or a few letters of it. But writing is one of those developmental milestones that varies greatly from child to child. Don't stress out if your child isn't even interested in writing.
A lot depends on fine motor development. Your child may have a clear dominant hand by now (or it may not be clear for another year or so). But it's still hard to control a pencil to make letters with diagonal lines (M, N, K). Other letters may not look quite right either. The lines might not connect at the right place, or letters like E may have too many horizontal lines. What kids should be able to do at this age is copy a circle and make an "x."
Regardless of where your child is on the spectrum, encourage his writing by keeping paper, fat pencils, fat crayons, and chalk within easy reach. Another way to pique interest: Pour sand, salt, or sugar onto a tray and show him how to trace letters with a finger.
Your life now
Some clever bedtime resisters prolong the routine by asking you to kiss not only them, but an ever-increasing cast of stuffed animals. If your child tries luring you into a 20-minute kissing party, put your foot down. What seems fun at first will get tiresome fast. Say, "You have too many animals for me to kiss. Let's pick three, and then I'll blow a big kiss to all the rest when I walk out the door."
Source http://www.parentcenter.babycenter.com/
12.7.08
3-year-old timeline: Can-Do Kid
Your 3-year-old now
"Look at me! Mom, look at me!" your preschooler calls as she zooms down the slide — headfirst. Her growing bravery on the playground may make you wince sometimes, not that she notices. She loves showing off new skills. As well she should — she's enormously proud of them.
At 3, children walk on tiptoe, try to stand on one foot (and might even succeed for a few seconds), gallop and try to skip, and pedal a tricycle. To keep these gross motor skills developing, shoot for at least an hour of physical activity a day. Unstructured play offers plenty of practice running and jumping. More organized games like tag, hopscotch, and simple ball games build endurance and coordination. To work on balance, encourage your child to walk next to you along a curb or follow a line on the driveway. Obstacle courses set up inside or outside help children grasp spatial relations: "Climb over the chair. Now skip around the cone." Better yet, show her yourself — you can get some exercise, too.
Your life now
If your child has a beloved blankie or stuffed animal, you've probably had to retrieve it from afar more than once. Maybe it was left at Grandma's and you had to fetch it in the middle of the night. Or you had to ask a hotel to FedEx it across the country after leaving it behind. You might be wondering when the jig will be up.
Whatever you do — don't do anything! Children let go of security objects at different ages. Some may be ready when they start preschool; some like to carry theirs to preschool in their backpack and leave it in their cubby by day. Others continue to sleep with a special pal well into elementary school and beyond. Most children wean themselves eventually.
To avoid losing a lovey, if you haven't already, establish some rules about where the blankie or bear can and can't go. For 3-year-olds who once had unrestricted limits on where to bring a lovey, make new "big kid" rules. If it never leaves the house, it's a lot easier to find. Obviously, doctor's appointments and vacations are reasonable exceptions. (By 3, a child's chosen object is usually so well-loved and tattered it may be too late to try the ol' buy-a-replacement ruse.)
source www.parentcenter.babycenter.com
"Look at me! Mom, look at me!" your preschooler calls as she zooms down the slide — headfirst. Her growing bravery on the playground may make you wince sometimes, not that she notices. She loves showing off new skills. As well she should — she's enormously proud of them.
At 3, children walk on tiptoe, try to stand on one foot (and might even succeed for a few seconds), gallop and try to skip, and pedal a tricycle. To keep these gross motor skills developing, shoot for at least an hour of physical activity a day. Unstructured play offers plenty of practice running and jumping. More organized games like tag, hopscotch, and simple ball games build endurance and coordination. To work on balance, encourage your child to walk next to you along a curb or follow a line on the driveway. Obstacle courses set up inside or outside help children grasp spatial relations: "Climb over the chair. Now skip around the cone." Better yet, show her yourself — you can get some exercise, too.
Your life now
If your child has a beloved blankie or stuffed animal, you've probably had to retrieve it from afar more than once. Maybe it was left at Grandma's and you had to fetch it in the middle of the night. Or you had to ask a hotel to FedEx it across the country after leaving it behind. You might be wondering when the jig will be up.
Whatever you do — don't do anything! Children let go of security objects at different ages. Some may be ready when they start preschool; some like to carry theirs to preschool in their backpack and leave it in their cubby by day. Others continue to sleep with a special pal well into elementary school and beyond. Most children wean themselves eventually.
To avoid losing a lovey, if you haven't already, establish some rules about where the blankie or bear can and can't go. For 3-year-olds who once had unrestricted limits on where to bring a lovey, make new "big kid" rules. If it never leaves the house, it's a lot easier to find. Obviously, doctor's appointments and vacations are reasonable exceptions. (By 3, a child's chosen object is usually so well-loved and tattered it may be too late to try the ol' buy-a-replacement ruse.)
source www.parentcenter.babycenter.com
5.7.08
3-year-old timeline: Magical Thinking
Your 3-year-old now
Learning to distinguish between fantasy and reality is a gradual process. During this year, your child is at an interesting juncture. He still practices what developmental psychologists refer to as "magical thinking," assigning traits to objects or people that are impossible but seem logical to your child's early reasoning abilities.
So, your child might believe that a letter dropped in the mailbox immediately flies right to Grandpa's mailbox. He might think that tigers live in trees, that birds can talk to him, and that there really is a man on the moon. Sometimes things grownups say are taken literally because they sound plausible to your child: "The mosquitoes are eating us alive." "You're killing me!"
At the same time your child is, bit by bit, figuring out that certain flights of fancy probably are not real: His toy airplane doesn't really fly. The Wiggles don't live inside the TV. This process takes years — witness 8-year-old tooth fairy and Santa Claus believers. No rush: It's wonderful to retain a little bit of magical thinking right into adulthood.
Your life now
Do mealtimes ever feel tense because your child won't touch a bite on his plate? Most experts advise against forcing a child to eat anything. Food should be a source of pleasure and nourishment, not power struggles. Research suggests that coercive feeding practices can lead to weight problems or eating disorders later in life. The child learns to associate food with control. Wait until the next regular snack or meal and offer food again then; if he's hungry he'll eat — or he may not, and that's fine, too. Most experts say it's best not to start the habit of preparing special meals for a finicky eater. But neither should you punish him for not eating. Just let it go.
source www.parentcenter.babycenter.com
Learning to distinguish between fantasy and reality is a gradual process. During this year, your child is at an interesting juncture. He still practices what developmental psychologists refer to as "magical thinking," assigning traits to objects or people that are impossible but seem logical to your child's early reasoning abilities.
So, your child might believe that a letter dropped in the mailbox immediately flies right to Grandpa's mailbox. He might think that tigers live in trees, that birds can talk to him, and that there really is a man on the moon. Sometimes things grownups say are taken literally because they sound plausible to your child: "The mosquitoes are eating us alive." "You're killing me!"
At the same time your child is, bit by bit, figuring out that certain flights of fancy probably are not real: His toy airplane doesn't really fly. The Wiggles don't live inside the TV. This process takes years — witness 8-year-old tooth fairy and Santa Claus believers. No rush: It's wonderful to retain a little bit of magical thinking right into adulthood.
Your life now
Do mealtimes ever feel tense because your child won't touch a bite on his plate? Most experts advise against forcing a child to eat anything. Food should be a source of pleasure and nourishment, not power struggles. Research suggests that coercive feeding practices can lead to weight problems or eating disorders later in life. The child learns to associate food with control. Wait until the next regular snack or meal and offer food again then; if he's hungry he'll eat — or he may not, and that's fine, too. Most experts say it's best not to start the habit of preparing special meals for a finicky eater. But neither should you punish him for not eating. Just let it go.
source www.parentcenter.babycenter.com
29.6.08
3-year-old timeline: Facing Fears
Your 3-year-old now
Bedtime fears are common for preschoolers. But children can be frightened of anything from loud noises to the idea of being abandoned by Mom and Dad. This makes sense: Now that they're more independent and can leave you, they also begin to realize that you can leave them.
Parents must walk a fine line here. You want to calm your child. But you don't want to fuel the fear. How to tread depends a bit on your child's personality. Some kids may be soothed if you check under the bed for monsters or squirt special "monster spray" (air freshener or water). Those with a scientific bent may see your monster hunt as proof that the creatures exist, so if your child only seems more upset, back off and try talking more directly about the fear: "I know a dark room can be scary. I was scared when I was your age, too." Offer a practical solution such as a night-light or a special back rub to calm her.
However you proceed, don't minimize your child's fears. Bluntly stating there's "no such thing" or "nothing to be afraid of" isn't logic she's going to buy into. Those monsters are very real to her. Your job is to help her cope, reassure her, and make sure she feels comfortable confiding in you.
Some don'ts:
When your child throws a tantrum, don't automatically assume she's tired. Other common triggers for 3-year-olds: Hunger, sickness, frustration over being unable to do something physical, and wilting from expectations that are too mature for her. Often the best response is no response: Give the tantrum a little time to burn itself out or, if you feel like you have to respond, hold your child (if you can) or rub her back. Realize, though, that her emotional state is much too primitive during a tantrum to respond to logical arguments or much other conversation.
source www.parentcenter.babycenter.com
Bedtime fears are common for preschoolers. But children can be frightened of anything from loud noises to the idea of being abandoned by Mom and Dad. This makes sense: Now that they're more independent and can leave you, they also begin to realize that you can leave them.
Parents must walk a fine line here. You want to calm your child. But you don't want to fuel the fear. How to tread depends a bit on your child's personality. Some kids may be soothed if you check under the bed for monsters or squirt special "monster spray" (air freshener or water). Those with a scientific bent may see your monster hunt as proof that the creatures exist, so if your child only seems more upset, back off and try talking more directly about the fear: "I know a dark room can be scary. I was scared when I was your age, too." Offer a practical solution such as a night-light or a special back rub to calm her.
However you proceed, don't minimize your child's fears. Bluntly stating there's "no such thing" or "nothing to be afraid of" isn't logic she's going to buy into. Those monsters are very real to her. Your job is to help her cope, reassure her, and make sure she feels comfortable confiding in you.
Some don'ts:
- Don't threaten that a monster will get her if she doesn't behave. Her literal little brain will believe you.
- Don't force her to confront her fears. She isn't equipped to do that at this age.
- Don't tell her that "big kids aren't afraid." That doesn't take the fear away. It just adds pressure and makes it more difficult for her to come to you.
When your child throws a tantrum, don't automatically assume she's tired. Other common triggers for 3-year-olds: Hunger, sickness, frustration over being unable to do something physical, and wilting from expectations that are too mature for her. Often the best response is no response: Give the tantrum a little time to burn itself out or, if you feel like you have to respond, hold your child (if you can) or rub her back. Realize, though, that her emotional state is much too primitive during a tantrum to respond to logical arguments or much other conversation.
source www.parentcenter.babycenter.com
19.6.08
3-year-old timeline: Your Little Storyteller
Your 3-year-old now
As your child's language skills evolve, he'll start to tell you more elaborate stories. Hooray! Storytelling is a great step in a preschooler's development.
It's happening now because at 3, your child is capable of a complex chain of events: He can experience something, think about it, and then tell a story about it. These stories — real or fictional or a mix of both — help little kids make sense of everyday events and the people they meet.
You may see your child telling stories to himself or his toys. They can be completely fantastical, or they can combine several real-life events into one narrative. If you're the audience, listen appreciatively. Encourage him with questions as he spins yarns about the picture he drew or the book he's reading. Invite him to add details to stories you tell.
To help keep the creative juices flowing, make sure your child hears stories of all kinds — fairy tales, anecdotes from your own life, fables, picture-book tales. Acting these stories out will also strengthen his imagination and storytelling abilities.
Your life now
Ever urge your child to hurry, only to see it have the opposite effect, as if molasses had just been poured over his head? Badgering a child to move faster can make him anxious. Better to try cajoling with a game or a race: "Let's see who can put on their shoes faster, me or you?" Or, "I'll race you to the car, ready, set, go!"
source www.parentcenter.babycenter.com
As your child's language skills evolve, he'll start to tell you more elaborate stories. Hooray! Storytelling is a great step in a preschooler's development.
It's happening now because at 3, your child is capable of a complex chain of events: He can experience something, think about it, and then tell a story about it. These stories — real or fictional or a mix of both — help little kids make sense of everyday events and the people they meet.
You may see your child telling stories to himself or his toys. They can be completely fantastical, or they can combine several real-life events into one narrative. If you're the audience, listen appreciatively. Encourage him with questions as he spins yarns about the picture he drew or the book he's reading. Invite him to add details to stories you tell.
To help keep the creative juices flowing, make sure your child hears stories of all kinds — fairy tales, anecdotes from your own life, fables, picture-book tales. Acting these stories out will also strengthen his imagination and storytelling abilities.
Your life now
Ever urge your child to hurry, only to see it have the opposite effect, as if molasses had just been poured over his head? Badgering a child to move faster can make him anxious. Better to try cajoling with a game or a race: "Let's see who can put on their shoes faster, me or you?" Or, "I'll race you to the car, ready, set, go!"
source www.parentcenter.babycenter.com
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